我还会为自己的病痛所苦，而且感到内疚

开心树

摘要: 疼痛，看似明明发生在身体层次，其实身体的意图，是要你忽略疼痛的真正源头乃是心灵中这一事实。所以你真正需要做的，就是在这处境中把焦点带回心灵，并看见产生疼痛的原因－心中不宽恕的念头，这就够了      Q #142:
I feel guilty about experiencing aches and pains.
  我还会为自己的病痛所苦，而且感到内疚   初译／学徒小组．感谢溪畔山阳润稿／若水审订   问：我认真练习奇迹课程已有整整12年的时间，也觉得奇迹课程是最适合我的灵修道路。不论我多忙，时时谨记着耶稣和祂的教诲，已成了我日常生活的一部份，帮我有意识的宽恕自己，并有意识的宽恕他人。我完全接受「所有疼痛都是某种形式的不宽恕」的说法(如课程所说：「所有的烦恼毫无疑问透露了你的不宽恕。」[W.pI.193.4:1])，但是，即使练习奇迹课程几乎已完全融入我的生活，毫不勉强，我身体上的各种疼痛和其它不适依旧存在。这让我开始怀疑，自己的练习是否有效。我唯一的选择仍是吞止痛药这种老把戏，在疼痛来袭时，即使心中叨念着「我不是一具身体。我是自由的。因我仍是上主所创造的我 」[W.pI.rVI.3:3,4,5] ，可惜效果似乎不太好。是不是归根究柢，仍是我那恐惧的潜意识在作祟？还是我上了小我的当，一直误信我已宽恕了自己？   Q #142: I have been a keen student of A Course in Miracles for a good 12 years and find it the most appropriate spiritual path for me. Thinking of Jesus and his teachings has become a part of my life, a way of consciously forgiving myself and thus of course others as well. I also accept fully that all pain is some form of unforgiveness (“Certain it is that all distress does not appear to be but unforgiveness” [W.pI.193.4:1]). Now regardless of my practice, which is almost on a continual and absolutely unforced basis, parallel to whatever else I may be occupied with, various aches and pains and other ailments do occur at a level which makes me question the efficacy of my practice -- my only choice then remaining the same old magic, usually a pain killer. Even ardently repeating a maxim like “I am not a body. I am free. For I am still as God created me” [W.pI.rVI.3:3,4,5] during an attack seems quite ineffective. Is it basically still a very fearful subconscious that is at the bottom of this, or is it the ego taking me for a ride and having me believe that I have forgiven myself more than I really have?   
答复：是的，你的潜意识里还埋藏着恐惧与内疚；小我不光是要愚弄我们，让我们以为自己有所进展，它还会吓唬我们，让我们以为自己毫无进展(T.18.V.1:5,6)，你当前的感受即属此例。

当我们仍认同这具有名有姓的身体时，这类事情会不断发生。究竟来说，把自己视为一具身体，意味着你仍然相信分裂为真，相信因分裂所生的罪疚为真，也仍然相信自己需要对罪咎采取防御措施，这正是身体存在的目的（身体的存在即是一个防御措施，用来掩盖“罪疚”的真实来源－心灵，这也就是你目前感到疼痛的原因。）。疼痛，看似明明发生在身体层次，其实身体的意图，是要你忽略疼痛的真正源头乃是心灵中这一事实。所以你真正需要做的，就是在这处境中把焦点带回心灵，并看见产生疼痛的原因－心中不宽恕的念头

，这就够了。
  Yes, there is still fear, as well as guilt, buried in your subconscious mind, and yes, your ego will always want to fool you about your progress, but also your lack of progress (T.18.V.1:5,6). All of that is to be expected while you still identify yourself as the body which has the name you answer to. For seeing yourself as a body means you still believe that the separation and its accompanying guilt are real and you still believe you need a defense against that guilt, which is the purpose the body serves. The pain, apparently in the body, is intended to distract you from its real source in the mind. So if you are willing to make the connection back to the mind and see the cause -- unforgiveness -- that is all you really need do.   如果止痛剂可以帮助你纾缓疼痛，当然可以继续使用。即使那不是所谓的彻底疗愈，又如何？要知道，耶稣绝不会因你自视软弱、或没能彻底宽恕而责备你的。面对疼痛，与其强用课程的字句说服自己疼痛不是真的，试着叫小我闭嘴，来掩盖你仍坚信自己是一具身体的事实；在这种情况下，吃药反而是对待疼痛较为温和、也更有爱心的选择。总而言之，只要你敢正视内在的信念，而且知道你为何相信它（正如你先前的自剖，这你知道是恐惧让你困在这些信念中）这对你绝对会有帮助的。光是认清并正视恐惧，你其实已经尽了自己在疗愈过程的份内工作。   If there is a pain killer that seems to be helpful in relieving your pain, by all means continue to use it. So what if it is not the ultimate healing? Know that Jesus is not judging you for what you may see as your weakness and inability to forgive completely. Taking medication is a gentler and more loving way of dealing with your pain than trying to persuade yourself that the pain is not real by using words from the Course as affirmations to shout down the ego and cover over what you still believe about yourself -- that you are a body. It will always be more helpful simply to get in touch with what you still believe and why, knowing, as you suggest, that it is only fear that holds you in those beliefs. By acknowledging and looking at the fear, you will be doing your part in its healing.   也许你可以看看Question #128，其中我们讨论了一些和你的问题相关的议题。   For a further consideration of issues related to the questions you raise, you may wish to look at
Question #128
.      转自：奇迹课程中文部 Ken Wapnic专栏 2009/1/14